I had a conversation with a dear, dear friend last night about how I've gotten back on the weight loss bus and have been riding for a while. She is one of my friends that absolutely inspired me and has lost a significant amount of weight twice on Weight Watchers (with a baby in between). She took a bit of a weight loss sabbatical this summer and when I jumped back on the bus, we drove to her house and honked the horn a few times. She peaked out the window and got a little curious and even came out to the porch to say hi. She thought about hopping on the bus and where it would take her but I think we came to the conclusion last night that she's just not ready to jump aboard and take a ride.
We've all been there, right?
I am aching for my friend to join me. I want (need?) larger friend in real life to talk to about this stuff. Sure, I've got one other friend doing Weight Watchers and we talk all the time but she's starting from a much lower weight than me this time around, not to mention she's a gym fiend and we all know how I feel about that. We're just a little different. I have other larger friends but one I don't think has the current knowledge and support to give it her all and the other has absolutely no desire to make any changes whatsoever in her looks and health. That's okay. My larger loser friend (who may eventually get a name) though, she's just not ready. She has the knowledge and she can visualize the future but as she's walking past her daughter's Halloween candy, she can't say no. I know what that's like and it's all too familiar. But why can I say no right now and she can't, even though she said no for 80 pounds not too long ago? The science of motivation really confuses me.
So what motivates us to lose weight and commit to diets and lifestyle changes. I've said before that I start Weight Watchers every Monday. I'm not kidding! Typically I start a diet and soon fail, stating that I'll start again the following Monday. This usually goes on for six weeks or so. Once in a while, it sticks. I jump on board. I do it for a month or so and feel a little bit of accomplishment, until I fall off the bus and tell myself each Monday that I'll wake up and walk to the closest bus stop. This, again continues for several weeks. I might walk to the stop, but rarely do I get back on board. How could I do it for a month or more but not have the motivation to continue after one indulgent night?
I've been doing this thing for 25 days now. Almost a month. Despite my recent difficulties, I think I'm still going strong. I'm planning on being on the bus for quiet a while. But who is really to say that my motivation will stick with me? How can I be sure that one day, the double cheeseburger will really motivate me more than the thought of building a house in onederland?
How do we do this?
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You're right- how DO we do this? I can say honestly that I wouldn't have gotten my butt up to exercise two years ago, but a year later I made it in to the gym pretty often. I think maybe it's about how much you really want it. Do you want the Doritos or the skinny jeans? You can have both, but it takes skill to know when to say when. I guess as long as we're happy then it's all good!
ReplyDeleteA very interesting topic, you've got me thinking!
Wow, what a thoughtful post!
ReplyDeleteAll I can say is that for me motivation started to kick in when time passed by. I was the typical I'll start a diet on Monday and failed it by Friday person. When I started to get deep in this weight loss thing I realised, even if I had a bad day, the next day I was motivated to try to stay on track. But something also worked for me. I took a photo of my bare back and belly at my highest weight, printed it out and put it to my notebook where I track my food. But the thing is, being at a highest weight is very hard to stay motivated because you just see the long road ahead. But as soon as you pass that (I had the same struggles) you'll find new things which push you forward. And reading blogs. Sometimes successes make me a little envy in my heart but envyness pushes me forward. And people ... with similar 'problems' here at the blogosphere.
However, once I read about motivation the followings:
“The whole idea of motivation is a trap. Forget motivation. Just do it. Exercise, lose weight, test your blood sugar, or whatever. Do it without motivation. And then, guess what? After you start doing the thing, that’s when the motivation comes and makes it easy for you to keep on doing it.”
Probably this is kinda the best answer for you right now.